On today’s episode of Relatable, we dive into a topic that seems to be fairly hot on social media these days, but is it in the right way? Red Flags. What are they? How do we recognize them? Your first instinct might be to RUN, but is it REALLY a red flag? Colter, Cayla and Lauren discuss the differences between red, yellow and green flags… and even break down how they see them individually.

Key Discussion Points:

• What is a Red Flag: Red Flag. Yellow Flag. Green Flag. Orange Flag? Red flags tell us its time to stop/run from the relationship. But how does one’s individual attachment system define if it might be a yellow flag? Maybe you should slow down and take a pause.
• Flags in the Dating Arena: So, you met someone. You go on a date. Then suddenly the communication stops. Are you being ghosted? Any normal person would immediately jump to questioning themselves about what they did wrong. But is it you? Maybe they told you they aren’t looking for anything serious. Probably a red flag. Not into labels, or want to keep things casual? That could be a yellow flag that could easily be turned green, because at least they communicated their needs upfront. We break down a few other instances when one might see it as red, but another might see it as yellow, and maybe a “pause” might help in making a decision whether you want to pursue this person or not.
• Flags in Established Relationships: Maybe your partner/spouse said, “You’re not allowed to go out with your friends.” Wait, what? Definitely a red flag. The word ‘allowed’ ALONE screams run. But maybe they had issues in the past that makes it impossible not to feel that way? Maybe this is a hard orange…? Do you give your partner access to your phone, or share your location? Green flag, right? But what if you are becoming obsessive about it? How often are you checking. Don’t want to talk about your past? We talk about our own experiences with our partners in these situations.

This episode is a lot like last weeks, where it really does come down to one’s individual boundaries, negotiables, and non-negotiables. But if you take anything from today’s episode, its that we all have a different window of tolerance when it comes to our intimate relationships. Just because it’s a red flag for someone you see on social media, that doesn’t automatically mean it will be for you.